Freedom Map #1: The Secret of Being

Define: Freedom Map

Freedom Maps are an article series authored by Lance Ong. Freedom Maps are designed to help a person break free of the limiting mindset which binds them to the Mouse Wheel.

Define: Mouse Wheel

 The mouse wheel is what traps most people in the nine-to-five grind. In recent years, this has become more of an issue when people feel the drain of running in circles; pushing hard but not making progress. Freedom Maps are aimed at breaking the Mouse Wheel experience and creating a more liberating life.

“A Boat Without a Rudder”

This is your first Map to Freedom. Using it, you will be able to touch upon a deep-rooted issue that bothers many people.

If you have been stuck on the mouse wheel for a while, you know two things for sure: 1) you repeat the cycle day after day, and 2) no matter how much you do, there is always more to come.

Would you not say that these are perfect conditions to develop the belief that life is meaningless?

You are not alone. Millions of people are lost in a flurry of activity where they just work continuously without considering where their actions are taking them.

A popular saying nowadays is: Take Action! Take Action!

But without clear deliberation, people often end up running in the wrong directions… wasting time, energy, and effort. This reveals two causes for failing: either you do not know where you are going, or you are not doing the right things to get there.

An ounce of clarity is worth a ton of effort.

“Time and Tide Waits for No Man”

Life is short. The average lifespan is about 80 years in a hygienic country. It seems long when you are young, but count your days and it becomes obvious how much time you have.

One year = 365 days. If your days passed like the seconds on a clock, it would take just six minutes for you to age one year.

What can you do in six minutes? Maybe watch a Youtube clip.

If you were to live till 80 (6 mins x 80), that would translate into 480 minutes on our clock, which is 8 hours.

From birth till death in one working day, simply by reducing the days into seconds.

So… how many of your hours have you used up? Take [your current age in years x 6 minutes] and divide by 60. You will get your answer.

My hope is not to sadden you, but to make you aware of the time limit we are dealing with.

You need to make steady progress towards your dreams if you want to achieve them while you still have vigor in your body.

One of the dangers to your progress would be if you got stuck doing something you dislike.

Too many late nights and dashing in circles doing pointless tasks, would drain your vitality and leave you stranded without reaching your paradise.

Thus the old adage: Do What You Love, Love What You Do.

Accept nothing less.

Questions and Issues with this Adage

“What if what I love, does not make money? For example, I love playing video games and chatting with friends.”

Yes, this is a question of tying what you enjoy doing to what the market wants. You cannot sell if the market does not want to buy, so succeeding at this is about developing your product or service for the customer.

You need to think in terms of contributing and making life better for others. Only then will others pay you for the value you provide. It might take time and thought to translate what you enjoy into what others will pay you for.

“What if I do not know what I love?”

This would be a serious problem. It could also mean that you might be unsure of where to find the joy in your life. I have a magic question which might be able to help you.

In times where life feels bland or meaningless, I ask myself the magic question:

“What would I rather be doing instead?”

Allowing your mind to flow freely around this question, you engage a magical faculty of your mind which begins with the amazing ‘F’ word.

Fantasy.

Yup, all you need to do is engage in a little fantasy. The purpose of which is to identify what feelings you sense inside you, when you are doing what you enjoy.

Areas to pay attention to are your head, your heart, and your tummy area. Most people report sensations in one or more of these zones when they are fully fantasizing.

I just want you to notice… what does it feel like when you are doing something you love?

If you have trouble fantasizing, then close your eyes and recreate the fantasy experience in your mind’s eye. Visualize with your five senses — see, hear, smell, taste, and touch everything as if you are really there now. Then notice what you feel.

When you have identified that sensation of joy within you, you now have a reference point for any activity you choose to undertake in your life.

Here is the secret: What you choose to do, should spark off that sense of joy within you.

If it does not, then you should re-evaluate the project you are considering for its value and significance to you.

If the work does not inspire you, please junk it. Select goals you find meaningful and worthwhile. That is the way to long-term happiness.

“What if I am tied down by responsibilities which prevent me from doing what I like?”

Handling your responsibilities well makes you a responsible person. I salute you for that.

At the same time, it is a question of what responsibilities are you choosing to take on, and are they in alignment with your long term goals?

Certain responsibilities like taking care of your parents and children are lifelong and should never be considered a burden. Supporting family is an honor and should be a driving force which gives you the strength to go further.

Thus, make the distinction between meaningful and meaningless responsibilities.

Meaningful responsibilities inject joy into your life; meaningless responsibilities drain life out. Both require sacrifice and will cause you to bear pain.

What pain are you happily willing to sacrifice for because the meaning it brings into your life is worth so much more?

On the flip side, if the pain you bear only brings you greater sadness, then please junk it. Life was never meant to be a meaningless torture.

If you are in such a situation, perhaps the goal is to see if you can muster the courage to get yourself out of it.

In difficult decisions, I often ask myself three questions:

“Who am I choosing to be?”

“By making this decision, am I living up to who I am?”

“Can I die with no regrets?”

At the end of life, seldom do people count their money, cars, or assets. On the deathbed, a person thinks about what they have been through in life, they count their memories of happy and sad times; they think of the people they love, they regret their wrongdoings and pray for forgiveness.

What you have achieved becomes less important than how you have lived.

Your responsibilities might not be great achievements to the eyes of others… but in your heart, you know they are most important to you because they define how you have lived your life through every decision you have made.

We are the accumulation of our actions… thus you realize that you are constantly creating yourself until the very end.

Are you happy with who you have become?

The only person you need to come to terms with is yourself. Everyone else in life was here to facilitate your growth.

You thought it was about proving yourself; it was about being humble.

You thought it was about getting what you want; it was about learning to give.

You thought it was about seeking maximum pleasure; it was about sacrificing for what you love.

A Definite Purpose in Life

If there is one direction you can be sure of in life, it is that of growing yourself to be better than you are. The development of your character equals the growth of your soul.

Fortune and achievement aside, it is who you have become which ultimately decides your success or failure in life.

I want you to succeed, so I am here to tell you the secret of Being:

Take every decision personally. It reflects who you are. Live by your principles with your long term goal in mind, and you will always do the right thing.

To gain deep insight that applies to you personally, explore the Mirror of Character, which points out the root issues you face on your journey through life. Discovering this has helped me break through my barriers, as I am sure it will help you overcome yours.

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